Thursday, March 30, 2006

Feeling rageful

This makes me so fucking angry. The Federal government refuses to recognise that the concept of marriage can extend to same sex relationships, so the ACT government decides to legislate to allow civil unions between gay couples, so that they have the same rights as heterosexual couples. And so, the Federal government feels it has to step in to prevent this travesty from happening.

And Philip Ruddock's circular argument??

The law prescribes what a marriage is, and you don't work through a civil relationship, which we know and understand the States and Territories can deal with, to suggest that it is the equivalent of a marriage, when it's not.

In other words, 'the law' says that marriage can only be between a man and a woman. Therefore, you can't have 'civil unions' allowing people the same rights, because then it would just be marriage under another name. And dammit, gay people can't get married!

Bigoted, homophobic, narrow-minded asshats. They're running our country, people!

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Oh, she wants to conquer the world completely

Phase 1: get some friends in high places. Y'know, as a hypothetical example, it would be useful to have a friend who might have access to, say, the Prime Minister, or one of his senior Ministers, and who could be brainwashed to perform a nice beheading tae kwon do maneuver to the tune of Relax... But unfortunately, male model friends can be a little hard to come by, so if perhaps you had a friend who was a doctor who might be about to move to Canberra to work closely with an aforementioned senior politician, and who might be able to have a positive influence on that politician, well, he or she might suffice. :)

Phase 2: find some adoring minions who will do your dirty work and fund your efforts to take over the universe. Hell, they might even set up a webring to celebrate your greatness*.

Phase 3: bring on the WORLD DOMINATION!! Bwahahahaha!

*Yes, I am the only Amie G in the world. Honest.

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Step into my office, baby

So I'm continuing with studies this year, and now that the uni semester has officially started, I've gone back to working 4 days a week instead of 5. The theory being that I'll use my extra day off to work on my thesis, so that I can get it all finished and handed in by the end of the year. Y'know, get stuck into lots of reading, narrow down the topic that I'm going to work on, have regular meetings with my supervisor and come up with a research proposal that I can flesh out as the year progresses.

Sounds good as a theory.

So yesterday afternoon, as I was conducting valuable scientific research while browsing through David Jones with my mother, a helpful sales assistant approached and admired the suit that I was looking at.

"Oh, that's a lovely suit", she said. "There are two different styles of pants available, these slimmer line ones and these more flowing ones. There are also two different jackets, and as you have a bigger bust*, you would probably want to go for the one-button rather than the two-button one."

Hee! A bigger bust!! Me!!! I could've hugged the sales assistant right then and there.

Being as I've never had such a compliment paid to me before, and am most unlikely to ever again unless I invest in some plastic surgery or an inflatable bra, I was determined to get as much mileage as possible out of my new status as well-endowed.

Mother: (holding up a top from Events) "Hmm, I love the colour of this top. And it's a pretty reasonable price, too - would be good for you for work. Although, the neckline might be a little low…"
Me: Ah, that's not a problem - us bigger-busted women can carry off tops like this easily! We've got so much cleavage to display!!


Me: clothes sizing is so hopelessly unpredictable. I bought a pair of pants the other day which were two sizes smaller than a shirt in exactly the same brand. How does that work?
Me: of course, it is most likely just that I have such an ample chest. I'm sure that's the cause of all my clothes sizing problems.

Ah yes, what wit!

The rest of my afternoon was amazingly productive. Do you know the best way to get something done that you've been putting off for ages and ages?? Find something that you want to do even less. Case in point: my car. I think the last time I washed it was about mid-2004… and yet, yesterday afternoon, it became imperative that I wash it RIGHT AWAY. That study I was supposed to be doing?? Pish, not nearly as important as getting my car clean this very instant!! Also, I had been inspired by hearing that the lovely Nads washes her car weekly...

And the results were amazing. The best part was the wheels - who knew that silver lurked somewhere under all that black??! It was like watching a beautiful butterfly emerge from its dull, grey and dusty cocoon.

Next Monday I'll be defrosting my fridge, or scrubbing out my oven, I'm sure.

*I refuse to consider the possibility that what she really meant was "you are quite broad across the back so this two-button jacket will look like crap on you". We all know that sales assistants are paid to be brutally honest to their customers, not to exaggerate the truth or flatter them!!

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Gone with the wind

I just read an SMH article that really gave my heart a wrench...

Lonely old lady dead in bed six months

A 79-year-old-woman's mail had been piling up at Umina Beach post office since last August.

When the post office alerted the police to check on her, they found the old lady's decomposed body in her bed .

Like the man found in Surry Hills, she had been laying there for some six months.

Isn't that the saddest thing ever? That she had no family, or friends, who were checking in on her, or thought it was strange that she hadn't rung them for a while... that noone tried to visit her for at least 6 months, and she died alone, without anyone to mourn her. Just awful.

I think that is one of my biggest fears in life - that I'll get to the end of it, and noone will notice that I'm gone... the world will keep on turning, and I'll be just another anonymous nobody, erased and forgotten like a chalk drawing washed away in the rain...

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Pick me! Pick me!

Poached from all and sundry over on Livejournal, the Johari Window - tell me which adjectives you think apply most to me, and compare it to how I perceive myself :) (There's also a Nohari Window, which lists negative traits - in the interests of my self-improvement, feel free to fill that one out too, anonymously or not, as you like).

Also, the best team name from the quiz night last night? "We put the 'sexy' in dyslexia". And close second goes to "Sex. Do it for the kids"

Monday, February 06, 2006

Sockmonkey Magic

It's almost Oscars time again, and as per tradition, Kris is running her annual Oscars contest, with a prize of her own creation going to the person to guess the most Oscar winners correctly. Being one of those talented artsy and crafty people, the prize is always fantastic. But this year, Kris has outdone herself with creative genius - the prize is two gay sockmonkey cowboys, complete with cowboy hats and boots! Ennis and Jack - just too cute! So go enter!

Thursday, February 02, 2006

Are we there yet??

Graargh. I hate this time of the day at work - too late to get anything productive done, too early to think about going home yet, and it's always around now that I get the munchies... and my desk drawer contains nothing edible. It's probably a good thing that our work snack bar is depleted at the moment, or I'd be sorely tempted by some Twisties or a Picnic.

I've been stocking up on healthy snacks at home - those Snakata rice crackers are not too bad once you get used to them (the seaweed ones are 99% fat free!!), and pretzels are also pretty good. Must remember to bring some in to work tomorrow!

Monday, January 30, 2006

Geek Love

Another quick post before I get into some rambling... Nadine pointed this site out to me a while ago, and there is some truly cool stuff there. Among my faves are the plush microbes, the marshmallow shooter, and of course the "Joss Whedon is my master now" t-shirt.

Friday, January 20, 2006

Bullet the Blue Sky

Link courtesy of TJ - go read Iraqi Invasion: A Text Misadventure. Brilliant and hilarious, even if you've never played Zork or MUDDed.

Thursday, January 19, 2006

I Love Work

Well, it's been a super-productive day today... Lookee at my new layout!! Stay tuned for some actual content :)